My sister’s husband and 13-year-old son died in an accident 2 days before Christmas. She wanted me to cancel the big party I was hosting. I said, “Sorry, but you can’t ruin the holidays for others too. I know you’re hurting, but don’t try to stop the joy for everyone else as well.”

She was silent. During the party, while we were making a toast, we suddenly heard a crashing
sound in my sleeping baby’s room. I rushed and was horrified to find my sister’s red suitcase in the hallway. Then, I entered my baby’s room and froze in shock when I saw her son helping her pack away my toddler’s clothes and toys -the ones that had belonged to her deceased son and which she had lent me when I had my boy. With tears, my sister said that I wasn’t worthy of them and that she was taking back everything that belonged to her boy. lam not sure how they had entered but what’s certain is that she looked on the verge of a nervous breakdown. She told me that I was a bad sister and that I didn’t deserve her or her family. Of course, all the other guests had heard us at that point, and everyone must have left the party thinking I was a bad person. Was I wrong to prioritize everyone else’s Christmas, even though my sister was grieving?
Becca