It’s not new for women to hide the fact that they are pregnant. A lot of them do it for work reasons, while others do it for more personal reasons. Still, it shocked a husband who found out by accident that his wife was pregnant. He still feels betrayed even though she has since admitted what she did and told him the heartbreaking reasons why. He asked us for help because of this.

Someone put me in a situation that makes me feel lost and hurt, and I need some help.

A note about an OB-GYN appointment was found by accident the other day while I was going through my wife’s desk drawer to find a stapler. I didn’t think much of it at first, but something was off about it. So, I told my wife the truth, and after some hesitation, she said it: she’s three months pregnant.

I was shocked right away. How could my wife hide something so important from me like being pregnant? Since she felt the need to hide this from me, it hurts because we’ve always taken pride in being honest with each other.

But as she told me why she was keeping it a secret, my heart began to soften.

She told me that she’s been feeling bad about herself because of a miscarriage in a past relationship, which was something she had never told me before. She was afraid that the same things would happen again, so she didn’t want to raise my hopes in case something went wrong. As time went on, though, she couldn’t find the courage to tell me the truth.

I want to understand and support her fears, but I can’t get rid of the feeling that I’ve let her down. She didn’t just hide the fact that she was pregnant; she also didn’t tell me about the birth of her first child. It’s like getting hit twice, and I don’t know how to deal with it all.

Am I wrong to be mad at her, even though she’s having a hard time? How do I handle this tricky situation so that I can forgive her while also taking care of my own hurt feelings? I’m not sure how to start moving on from this.

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