In times of trouble, our mother is supposed to be our biggest support and ally, but things don’t always work out the way we think they should. Stephy was going through the worst time of her life when she was 24. She had three kids and no one to turn to but her mother. Stephy was in a tough spot, though, because her mom wouldn’t help. After all these years, her mother is now asking her daughter for help. Stephy reached out online to get help figuring out how to handle this tricky situation.

This is the letter from Stephy:

I lost my boyfriend in a car accident when I was 24 years old. I have three kids. Since I was only making minimum wage and couldn’t pay rent or feed my kids at the same time, I had to ask my mom to take us in. She said no because her new boyfriend wouldn’t like it. It was the hardest years of my life when I was by myself with my kids. We didn’t have much. I worked three jobs and didn’t get more than four hours of sleep for years. We lived off of coupons. After a few years, I was able to stand on my own with a little help. Now I’m a proud mom whose kids are healthy and whose income stays steady.

After seventeen years, my mom showed up at my door, even though I hadn’t heard from her in that time. She is now homeless and on her own, and she wants my help. I told her I would let her stay for a week at least. “If I had helped you back then, you wouldn’t have been able to do all this,” she said as I shut the door in her face. You seem to have done well in life now that you have your own home. I couldn’t believe she was so bold. But she went on, “My boyfriend at the time had made me forget that I had responsibilities to you as a mother.” I loved him too much and was scared to lose him. I’m sorry.” “Please don’t forget that a mother is not perfect,” she said before she left. I’m just a person…”

That’s because she ignored me and her grandchildren for years, even though she knew we had nowhere else to go. I can’t forgive her.

What must I do?

Thank you, Stephy”

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