I told my stepdad I wasn’t getting married, but I wasn’t expecting the horrific outcome.

We aspire for our wedding day to be among the most joyous occasions in our lives, where we wish for all our cherished ones to be present to share in the celebration. Regrettably, Lynn found herself in the difficult position of having to choose between her father and stepfather to attend the momentous event. Despite making her decision at the time, Lynn later felt profound remorse upon realizing the repercussions. Seeking guidance, she reached out online for counsel.

Lynn’s letter:

“Since I was nine years old, my stepdad Pat has raised me since my dad was often at work. My dad didn’t like Pat at all. Even after she died last year, mom tried to keep things calm between them.

My dad was going to walk me down the aisle at my wedding. My dad agreed, and he even offered to pay for everything. But there was one catch: Pat couldn’t be at the ceremony.

It broke my heart because I love my stepdad. I wanted at least my dad to be there because I had just lost my mom, so I had to tell Pat not to come. He agreed and didn’t say anything else.

Pat left the country and wrote me a letter on my wedding day, while my dad walked me down the aisle. I was shocked when I found it a few days later. Reading it made me cry so hard.

He told her how much he loved her and me, and how he hoped to see me on my wedding day.

He said he didn’t think I would take away that right from him. He said, “There is one last thing you should know: the real parent is not the one who gives you money and shows up whenever they want; it’s the person who holds your hand and mends your sorrows as you grow up.”

At the end, he said, “I want you to know that I still love you very much, but since you didn’t fight for me to witness your big day, then maybe we shouldn’t be in each other’s lives at all.”

As I read these words, my whole world fell apart. Pat raised me, and I don’t want him to leave my life. But I feel like I hurt him so much that I can’t go back.

How do I make this right?

Thanks, Lynn”

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