My mother-in-law desires to have my unborn child taken from me because I refuse to follow her rules.
Recently, a 22-year-old woman posted her story on Reddit, where it may be viewed as scandalous or even horrific. The MIL of the OP has planned a genuine hunt for the unborn child. She doesn’t really love children either; rather, her true motivations are much more grounded. She only wants her DIL to comply with her one request and obey.
Within her family, the woman’s pregnancy became a topic of conversation.
“So I have been with my partner for about a year and a half,” the woman wrote in the opening line of her post. We haven’t been together for very long, primarily because he lives in a different state and I’ve had problems figuring out how he feels about me. Although he and I weren’t seeing anyone else, we weren’t exclusive.
Then, by some miracle, the woman received good news. “A few months ago, I discovered that I was pregnant,” the writer wrote. Though neither L nor I had ever expressed a sincere desire for children, I did wish to have babies someday. Normally, at 22 in a casual relationship, I would be opposed to having a child, but I couldn’t get rid of the excitement and happiness that lingered. When I told L about my intentions to keep the baby, the genuine joy and excitement on his face caused me to change my mind.
The happy news caused the couple to reassess their relationship.
According to the woman, they both agreed that they were prepared to become parents. “I can support my baby and myself as an on-call healthcare professional, while he lives with his parents in a house they inherited and pays for their bills,” she wrote.
The partnership between the two solidified. “He asked if I wanted to keep the baby and offered to really step up,” the woman wrote. Right now, his career is more of a hobby, but he promised to find steady work if we kept the baby.
The woman stated that since learning she was pregnant, everything in her life has only gotten better. “I decided to keep the baby,” she declared. “We are really excited and moving forward.” I had been holding back on my feelings for him, and it made me realize that. After admitting that he loved me too, we have become exclusive and intend to move in together.
The woman’s MIL showed signs of a serious issue.
The woman continues, “The issue is that we have decided to return to my state because that is where my support network is,” she says. His mother, who had always been a pleasant and impartial presence, objected to our plans as soon as we sat them down to discuss them.
She freaked out and wouldn’t let him go. She said I could give birth in his state, and they would set us up, since they were his parents. I tried to tell her that I would feel better about having the baby and raising it close to my family, but she hardly listened to me when I refused. After interrupting her, we departed.
However, the MIL of the OP changed into a very evil person. “Since then, she has been harangueing L, trying to get him to reconsider,” the woman clarified. I won’t go into their financial circumstances here, but they even threatened to take away his inheritance. I am self-sufficient, so this didn’t bother me, but L is under a lot of stress.
The final straw was MIL’s suggestion that she would take the child away.
The woman continues, sharing, “He kind of suggested a 50/50 situation.” I mentioned how stressful that would be for me and how difficult it would be for a newborn. Though we still haven’t reached a consensus, he will support whatever choice I make. But because he is so close to his parents, I feel a little bad.
Things did not, however, improve. The original poster stated, “We had another sit-down, and when she hinted that she might be able to assert grandparent rights—given that they have significant assets—I became very agitated.” I wanted to go scorched earth at the thought that she would try to take my unborn child from me. When I screamed, L told her she was acting inappropriately. We departed.
The family is currently facing a very difficult situation. “Since then, we got a hotel and haven’t been back to his house,” the woman says. Although I don’t intend to give birth in this state, I’m worried that her claim has some merit. If my approach to this situation is unreasonable, please let me know.
Reddit users responded quickly, offering encouragement and guidance.
In the comments, people have sided with the woman and made every effort to console her.
“L’s mom is ignorant and just shot herself in the foot, badly… this is NOT how supposed “grandparents rights” work at all,” a user commented. OP, there is no risk to you.
A cursory Google search reveals that those purported rights are hardly enforceable in any situation other than very specific ones, like divorce, domestic abuse, and—above all—a prior relationship with the child, which is typically semi-custodial or caregiver-type, etc. Furthermore, no reasonable judge would EVER separate a child from their normal parents due to a crazy grandmother.
You may need to find a good lawyer just in case, but unless she meets certain requirements—which she WON’T as long as she’s never a caregiver—she can still use her money to harass you, which will be pointless but annoying. Otherwise, she’ll just be wasting money, so everything will be fine.
“I was coming here to second this,” a user added. Unless the parents are unfit and the grandparents have behaved like de facto parents, the parents will always be the children’s primary caregivers. She will be laughed out of court because she has no credibility. signed a graduate of law school preparing for the bar exam.
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